October - November 2001
Among Women
In case you haven't noticed, I think it's best to write about
sex, astrology, or anything else, for that matter, from a personal
perspective, based on real experiences, my own inner awareness
and what people have told me personally. But especially sex.
One of those experiences is the joy of women in harmony.
Women in harmony? Is this not an oxymoron, like act naturally,
airline food, British fashion or serial monogamy? Do we not just
know that women are raised or perhaps born to mistrust and undermine
one another, to compete and to honor no limits in that game?
And were they not taught this by men, as a divide and conquer
tactic (as the feminists tell us)? Or did they learn it from
mom, as part of their basic training for planetary survival and
perpetuating the war between the sexes (mom having been so throughly
impressed by dad)?
It may not matter if we want to solve the problem. We don't
often recognize the process, but most of our ideas of social
organization are based on rather vicious principles that undermine
and limit us at every step. They are based on domination and
the denial of mutual interests, which is a keynote of
Scorpio.We feel the results as scarcity, isolation, and, most
thrilling of all, chaos in our personal relationships, chaos
that often sufraces as sex, secrecy and money issues. All of
this is the result of inner fragmentation.
So let me state this theory straightforward-like. We are at
war with ourselves and in conflict with one another. They are
the same thing.
Fragmentation of this kind spreads from within to all relationships...
whether we call them friendships or lover situations, room-mate
scenarios, family relationships or something blending all of
these (as marriage ideally would). We could, and do need, to
look closely at what both men and women are taught about themselves
and about one another, and not presume this is the way things
have to be, if, of course, we want things to be different.
Women in Harmony
There is another dimension of woman, let's call her Goddess-conscious,
or Self-conscious, or seeking awareness, who remembers the community,
safety and pleasure that is possible when women are mutually
supportive, work together, and especially when they don't need
to get catty about men. Let's add this quality to the long list
of good things forgotten and needing to be remembered. Let's
add this to the list of fun ways to spend the afternoon, or one's
life -- and do so remembering that life is created by sex, and
that healthy sex celebrates life and human contact.
Let's remember that religion has taught us to be ashamed of
being alive.
Ancient Taoist and Tantric texts have a lot to say on this
theme, but I want to stick to the basic idea that I've found,
as a man, it's really healthy and deeply pleasurable to be among
women in harmony. I mean this both erotically and socially, not
forgetting creative situations, either.
I speak to women as well here. Your life will be better if
the men around you are in harmony. To many this may seem impossible:
the men in your life may not have even heard of one another,
much less ever spoken to one another, and you might regard this
as terrifying or catastrophic were it to happen. But if you look
at the harmonizing as an inner experience where seemingly disconnected
parts of yourself begin a dialog and start admitting things honestly
to one another, the world slowly changes. This is what I have
found, anyway.
I have found that it helps to ask those seemingly separate
parts to connect. I do so in my inner world, and as they appear
in the outer world, in the form of people, in the same room and
see what we all have to say to one another.
When hearts are open and when communication is clear, and
when intentions are understood, speaking can become touching.
But it is not necessary that people touch: only that we tell
the truth about how we feel.